Mother of Dragons

I know I have an unhealthy relationship with our bearded dragon, Marshall. I talk to him, I sing to him, I feed him by hand, I sit with him outside, I kiss him, I snuggle him, and I put him to sleep at night. And I know many people do not understand this relationship at all and really, I just don’t care. You see, Marshall is the lizard savior king. What does this mean? I’ll tell you.

When my daughter was at her sickest and in the hospital she talked about having a pet at home that could help her distract herself from her depression and pain. We already had 2 dogs and she’s allergic to cats and bunnies so I thought, hmmmm, maybe a reptile would be good. My oldest loves reptiles and suggested a bearded dragon because they are very calm, affectionate, and easy to take care of. Some of you will remember this post Marshall the lizard king and understand where all the Marshall madness came from. You’ll know all about how Marshall got sick when we first got him and how I nursed this fucking dragon back to health much like Daenerys took care of her baby dragons in early Game of Thrones episodes. And now? Now he has a place in my heart forever because he is Marshall the lizard savior king.

It’s been one year and seven months since we had to take my baby to the emergency room because she no longer wanted to live. It’s been a journey of roller coaster rides and highs and lows and upside downs and please god let me off this ride. It’s shown me that I really can get through anything one breath, one step, one day at a time no matter how bad it might seem in the process. It’s allowed me to understand that no matter how you prepare yourself, your children, your house, your world, they can all be rocked right down to the very core in a matter of minutes without warning so you better just hunker down and ground yourself to something that doesn’t move and hold on fucking tight. It’s made me appreciate the good moments so much more than I ever did and to make more light of the dark moments because the alternative is just not possible for me.

And in the midst of it all has been Marshall, the lizard we got to save our daughter’s life. And in the process he has saved all of us, not just my daughter. He sits there on his rock and sun bathes and gives us all a big side eye as if to say, you’re all just cray man, take it from me, just soak in the rays and live your best life. And he is calm through all the madness, he trusts us implicitly, and he is not shaken by all of the commotion of life around him. He has become my grounding force and the pet in the family that I go to when I need to just sit and breathe and be. My older daughter does pretty much the same. When she was stressed the other day over god knows what she went right to his tank and took him out and snuggled him all up. When my husband needs a smile he talks to Marshall even though he rarely gets a response. When my baby whose life he saved is feeling down she immediately takes him to her room and cuddles him and pets him until she can see the other side of her feelings. Every day Marshall gives us all exactly what we need. So if you see pictures of me with Marshall or just of Marshall know that he is so much more than a lizard, he is Marshall the lizard savior king and he is magical.

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